Saturday, May 3, 2014

No-Nonsense Chayaisms-Sex...Sexual harassment


A word that is taboo in polite society? But an act that is corrupting this very fabric of social norms and its values. Is it attractive because of the ‘hush hush’ aura surrounding it? What is worrisome is that it has assumed prime importance in the life of men and women and tragically, children too. There is too much emphasis on sex in books, films and real life. As a teenager, reading Mills and Boon romances, I was thrilled with the stern and handsome man warding off the mushy glances of the pretty young heroine till he succumbs to her simplicity and charm and falls in love with her to passionately kiss her in the last page. It sent us into dream world of ethereal romance-whatever that means! But the whole scenario has changed now. The story begins with a steamy account of the sexual encounter of the man and woman and slowly progress towards love. It is like putting the cart before the horse. Sex is fine as long as it is confined to marriage and with the married partner. Anything outside of it is unhealthy for the individual and society. In a society otherwise devoid of permanence, a world otherwise lacking any sense of purpose whatsoever, married sex is the most pleasurable, married love the most meaningful.   

                 Sexual harassment:

Why do women fall prey to sexual harassment at workplace or anywhere else? Some say it is because they are afraid of losing their job, some because they are afraid of others ‘blaming’ them, some because they are afraid of retaliation if they resist! The common refrain is fear. Men hesitate to stalk women who are confident and assertive. They are smart enough to choose a victim who silently suffers the assault, for whatever reason. On the other hand, there are some women who ‘kiss and tell’. They initially lead the man to believe he has a chance to win her favours and when it gets too close for comfort, raise an alarm! It is high time women learn to handle such situations themselves without resorting to legal redress. It is our mind and body and we should protect it from unwelcome advances. Having been in diverse profession like Advertising, Journalism, Modeling, Acting and Public Relations, there have been many situations when I have had to ward off predators. It was my communication skills and assertiveness that put the men in their place. While I am happy that there are legal remedies, I feel it would be better for women to be empowered enough to curb the culprits. As for men inclined to do this base act, I would say ‘kuch tho sharam karo’.