Wednesday, January 22, 2014

WHEN MOTHER'S LOVE IS BLIND



There is the story of a young criminal sentenced to death. As his last wish, he wanted to meet his mother. The jailer brought her and the criminal slapped her on her cheek. The jailer was taken aback and wanted to know why he did that and he answered, ’If she had done this to me long ago, I would not have ended this way’. I am a regular follower of different Soaps on TV, not as entertainment but more as a form of edutainment.  What we see there is not the figment of the imagination of those who churn them out day after day.  They look around them and find the inspiration from life. The next series of my blog are about the role of mother/father in the mental grooming of the child and the impact it has on the entire life of the child.
Will start with the popular Pihu of ‘bade ache…”.Pihu is the prototype of a spoilt child who has her parents eating out of her hand.  Right from her diet consisting of chocolates and aloo paratha, she not only gets her way but is also pampered with it.  Her conversation is very precocious and the parents are very proud of it.  She grows up as a willful girl who has to just demand and it is there on a platter.  This encourages her to be very manipulative among her peers and with the family.  She goes to the extent of accusing her school fellow of trying to rape her while actually she was caught in his arms willing.  Her mother Priya believes her story because she ‘wants to, lest her own reputation as mother will be at stake!! This whole charade leads to the suicide of the innocent boy and Priya keeps her husband out of all this, wanting to handle it herself!!  When there is no team work between husband and wife, it results in situations that only one parent will not be able to sort out and the child takes advantage of it!
Pihu was the pivot around which every activity in the family is planned, including her engagement to her childhood friend of the family who is in love with another girl.  Pihu is very adamant about ‘having’ Sammy for her husband despite his love for another girl. She is only after him to prove her point-that Pihu gets what Pihu wants and her totally besotted father agrees to ‘get’ her man for her like he is some object to possess! The brat is now totally in charge of her parents.  The mother, who was initially responsible for spoiling her, now tries to do the right thing for the wronged girl, Sammy’s love who is now pregnant with his child.  Pihu does not care…she is too used to having her way, thanks to her indulgent father and righteous but weak mother. She demands that her father choose between her and Priya who is against the marriage! Priya willingly walks out of the house, not wanting to make it difficult for her husband to chose.  She is as blinded by love for her husband as she has been for her daughter!
History repeats itself!!  In the Mahabharatha, Gandhari willingly blindfolded herself and remained blind to the faults of her sons, thus losing all of them.  There is a better way of showing love to children than succumbing to every demand of theirs.Short term gratification results  in long term mortification!!