Thatha’s seventieth birthday was
a joyous event. It was family get
together which was significant in more ways than one for me. Thatha was a real nice man. After he retired, he and a few like minded
friends had got together and founded the National Institute of Engineering at
Mysore. One of the four blocks of this
premier college is named after him. He
was a superintending engineer with Sir M Vishveshvariah when the Krishnarajasagar
dam was built. Grandpa’s name, N
Krishnaiengar, is etched on the stone entrance to the Dam, along with those of
others who worked at that time. Every
time we visit the Brindavan Gardens, we stand before it and go on an ego
trip. Who said that the good that men do
is interred with their bones? It is
carved on stone. The first time I took
my sons and showed them my grandfather’s name, they kind of took me more
seriously! How many of their friends
could boast of such a lineage!!?
The entire clan descended to
celebrate thatha’s birthday. All his
nine children pooled in to make it a grand affair. In the evening, my uncle Satyan organized a
family sports meet. I have to pause
awhile and write about my aunts and uncles.
Dad’s four sisters are a riot.
Full of verve they are excellent home managers and game for a good
time. Now past eighty and ninety
respectively, they can out-talk any one at any given time. Age has not withered nor has time staled
their zeal and enthusiasm for a hot bit of gossip. They are my mentors as I interacted with them
a lot during my childhood and learnt different skills from each of them, in
home management.
The youngest of all, aunt
Bhagya, was the first woman to graduate in the family, way back in the
40’s. She acquired an Honors Degree in
Child Psychology and has done wonders with her four children who are doing well
in life.
Going back to the birthday
celebrations of thatha, the family sports event was uncle Satyan’s idea. We had games for every age group, including
aunts and uncles. Thatha and grandmother
gave away the prizes. That night, we had
a sing song session and Brinda was the star of the show. I clapped in glee and was so proud of her. At that moment, I caught uncle Satyan’s eye
and it was mocking me. ‘Is that all you
want to be? Just be a cheerleader’? It seemed to say. He took me out for an ice cream later and
said, ‘you can do it kid. Do something
with your life’. I was just over ten and
something snapped in me. ‘Swoosh’ it
said and I knew life would never be the same.
May be it was the birth of the Guild of Women Achievers at that
point! Since then, every time I am faced
with a situation I feel unable to handle, I remember his words ‘you can do it
kid’. However, I continue to be a
cheerleader of women who achieve anything and never ever feel envious. I strongly believe that every woman’s motto
ought to be, ‘you can do it kid’.
Those halcyon days at 43
Nazarbad were soon to end. One afternoon
thatha was getting ready to go to the Engineering College Founders’ meeting as
usual. His Tonga (horse driven carriage) was waiting at the gate. I helped him into his coat as he had a frozen
shoulder and could not swing his left arm back.
He asked me to take it off and tell the Tonga driver to go as he was not feeling too well. Grandmother was having her afternoon
siesta. In a feeble voice, he called me
to his bedside and asked me to wipe his face.
He was sweating with rivulets of it flowing down his forehead. I wiped and wiped and it did not stop. I ran upstairs and called uncle Gopal. On the way upstairs, I glanced at the clock
and it showed a couple of minutes after 3 p.m. When I glanced at it later, it
was the same. The clock had stopped and
it gave me a queasy fear in my tummy.
Ever since I can remember, that clock had never stopped because thatha
wound it every day. I ran to his
bedside. Uncle Gopal was wiping away the
pouring sweat.I ran to wake up grandmother. She took one look at her husband’s
face and said “go to Chandrika’s house and ring up your father”. I ran as fast as I could and called dad at
the office. My parents had moved a couple
of months ago to Mysore as dad wanted to be with his aging parents and take care
of them.
I will never forget my first
introduction to death. There was thatha
lying on his bed, surrounded by grandmother, my uncles, dad, ma, my little sis
Gay and myself. He looked once at his
wife and companion for over sixty years, patted my little sister on her head, and closed his
eyes. It was the most majestic
sight. It is said that a person’s worth
is measured by the way he dies. If that
is true, thatha must have gone straight to the angels. I stood looking at his still face and the
first thing I could think of was I did not have to help him with his coat. It was hanging next to his cupboard and the
sight of it, alone and desolate, made me break down. My best friend had died, before my very
eyes.
***
No comments:
Post a Comment