We associate manners with opening doors and chewing with one's mouth closed. But there’s more to it. The crux of it all is consideration. Let us take a few examples of this.
Are you living in a multistoried building?
Then read on… Don't let your children skate or play hockey at home. They are also fond of thumping on the floor or dropping marbles. All this can be extremely irrigating to the hapless occupants of the flat below. Avoid walking up and down the house in high-heeled shoes. Grinding your masals or rearranging your furniture should be done in the morning-never in the afternoon or night.
Don't throw garbage from the window. If you have to dry your clothes on the window sill, don't decorate it with underclothes! Keep common passageways clean. Don't sweep out all the muck in your house, into the corridor.
Are you invited to speak at functions?
Learn to be brief... Consideration for the listeners is the first priority. Respect your listeners' intelligence and they will appreciate your effort. Don't adopt a supercilious attitude because you have agreed to speak- remember, they have bestowed on you the honour of their willingness to listen. Ensure you know enough of your topic.
Bragging about your child!
“My munna is very smart; he can recite one to tem without missing out a number"
It is bad taste to go on talking about one's child to others. After all, your child may be very special to you but certainly not so to all and sundry!
Equally unpalatable is the case of a wife going on and on about her husband or vice versa. "My wife bakes the best cake in town" may sound like music to the wife concerned, but not to others. In company, it is not too polished to keep on raving about one's spouse… the other extreme lies in constantly picking on the spouse. It makes the listener very uncomfortable. If you have to fight with your hubby or wife, do so in the privacy of your room, not even before the children.
Money shouts…wealth whispers
What about those who show off their wealth? "Oh my! What a cosy little flat! It must be such fun to live in such a small house. Ours is so big we don't know what to do with all that space"...tch..tch.
Another 'cheap'way of flouting one's wealth is putting out one's best silver or expensive crockery when entertaining someone who can never dream of possessing them. For fear of breaking the fragile china or dropping the cut glass bowl, they will neither eat nor drink.
A gracious person does not brag about his position or pay. As shakespeare said, it is 'Small things that make base men proud".
In the mad race for the room at the top, we have left behind some of the graces that add that special something called a 'touch of class' to our actions.
Take a simple thing like sending out invitations. The most important thing to remember is the person's name and designation. Quite often the name is misspelt, which only goes to show how sincere you are in desiring the person's presence. It is also necessary to find out if he has a salutation or rank attached to his name. The invitations from VIP's like the governor or minister, are on a printed card and in the third person. They usually carry RSVP and the receiver should send in his acceptance or regret, as early as he can .Private dinners or parties can have written invitations in the first person. Needless to say the writing should be legible. For an informal party the telephone is convenient.
When you accept an invitation, do not back out of it without informing the hostess, sufficiently in advance. If you don't turn up when she is expecting you, it can mar her whole party. If the time is mentioned, arrive five minutes after. If you have to be late, ring up and say so. It is most annoying for everyone to have to wait for you while you nonchalantly take your own time
If you are throwing a party on your birthday or anniversary, there is no need to mention the same in your invitation, it is tantamount to asking for a gift. If you are using a letterhead for writing your invitation, let it be a simple one with only your name, Address and telephone number. Cut out all the imposing degrees and designations. Don't scribble the invitation on any odd paper either. Put the invitation in an envelope and address it. Don't invite anyone through a third party, by asking him to pass on the message. Don't accept this kind of invitation either. It is better to be specific and say, "Can you join us for dinner on...night? Another casual but non committal kind of inviting is, "Come and have a bite with us one of these days"
Invite only if you must, as to an official party; or if you want to throw an informal party, invite only those you like.
Life is beautiful if we all follow certain code of conduct in every aspect or our life..